G'ampa C's Blog

Saturday, July 28, 2007

A Reason To Get Up Early

This morning I awakened before 5:00am to that old familiar feeling... a twinge of pain in my side that slowly becomes the enormous, inescapable pain of yet another kidney stone. This was number 15, I think. After an hour and a half of pacing, kneeling and fighting the pain, I think it is gone. But...
The passage of stones always leaves me weak but also very sensitive to things around me. Maybe it's the intense pain, I don't know. As I walked outside at dawn, the morning was soft, warm and the air was still. A few clouds, a few stars. Birds singing like crazy, especially doves, cardinals and jays. The people sounds even seemed friendly, somehow. Cars on the freeway almost a mile away, traffic on the next street, the person delivering papers, someone is jogging. Then it dawned on me:
"Be still and know that I am God." calls for a state of spirit, not a circumstance of decibels. When I am used up, He makes Himself known. When I have nothing left, He has plenty. When I have become "i" small case at the end of my rope, I finally lose my grip and fall six inches into his hands. The reward for the draining, exhausting pain is a keener sense of God and his presence; a reason to get up early.
I'm not so clueless that I think this is a pat answer to suffering, but I have been made aware this morning that suffering can produce great reward from God.

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1 Comments:

  • At 8:34 AM, Blogger Kathy said…

    Oookay! Now I've found you again after misplacing your blog in my latest PC move, will you reciprocate by blogging? :)

    Pesty Kathy

     

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